If you can count on me for anything, it’s to give you the straight goods on country living. No fluff.
You’re not going to find me waxing poetic about how la-de-da wonderful everything is every moment of every day – especially when it comes to the real benefits and challenges of living in the country.
Let me kick this off by making it super clear that I LOVE living in the woods. I’ve been back here for 3-and-a-half years (after growing up in the area many moons ago), and I can honestly say that (at this point anyway) I never want to live in the city again. Visit, for sure. But to live full-time? Absolutely not.
But I can’t help but feel for people who are seduced by books and articles and sometimes friends and acquaintances painting a ridiculously rosy picture of the rural life. I’m sure we’ve all heard the stories of the city-dwellers who packed up everything and moved to the country, assuming they’d done their research, only to find they couldn’t make friends, hated the neighbor’s wayward cows, and spent too many hours commuting to their jobs, completely blowing their new found ‘quality of life’ right out of the water.
So today, I wanted to get my own list of challenges of rural living down ‘on paper’ (pros/benefits to follow in my next post). If it helps even one person considering a move from the city to ensure their decision is the right one for them, I’ll be happy! Country living is amazing, but it’s definitely not for everyone. I definitely don’t have all the answers – far from it – and I’ve made a very LONG list of my own mistakes. That said, I hope this helps:
The Cons/Challenges/Drawbacks to Living in a Rural Community
This list is really hard for me to write, because I don’t want to sound ungrateful (or like I know it all – I SO don’t), but the truth is that for many folks used to city living, country living is a really foreign thing. Very foreign! Sometimes so foreign it drives them more than a little bonkers – or leaves them in tears. Or divorced.
So without further ado, here are a few things I’ve found personally, and heard from others, about the things they found most challenging the first year or two after moving from city to country:
- Feeling like part of a community – Social circles in many small communities can be notoriously hard to break into. I’ve met a lot of people who have moved to our community from the city who have said it was really challenging to make friends here. The ‘old-timers’ can be suspicious of newcomers (sometimes with good reason), and a small group of recent transplants want to pull up the drawbridge behind them, shooting resentful rhetoric and angry glances to anyone who moves in after them. I’ve also heard this is one of the big fears of many considering moving to a rural community. The best way to get through this? Volunteer. Once you’re settled, get out there and start donating a portion of your time and services to local social agencies, your children’s school, or a food security group. There’s no better way to show you want to be part of a community than getting involved.
- Getting used to the quiet – and the new sounds – If you’ve lived in the city for any amount of time, and especially if you’ve never lived anywhere else, the relative quiet of the country can be enough to make you want to break out the white noise machine. Say what you want about loud conversations and honking horns, but there’s something reassuring about knowing there are other people about. Those first few nights are going to be painful – don’t count on sleeping much. I spent my first few weeks here in a very sleep-deprived state thanks to all the unfamiliar thumps, bumps and ‘woos’ out in the black woods. There’s really no way to avoid this – your city nervous system will need some time to mellow out. And mellow out it will! Eventually, you’ll be able to relax and enjoy the peace.
- Not being able to sleep in anymore (or go away for the weekend) once you have livestock – I have to be honest and say that this one kept us from adding chickens to our little homestead sooner than we did. The idea of having to find someone to care for them every time we wanted to go away for more than a few hours sort of put the kaibosh on my self-reliance plans for awhile. But then we found a solution – co-parenting! I guess you could call it co-op livestock. We found friends who wanted to share in the cost and responsibility and voila, we were egg farmers! OK, it wasn’t quite that easy, but knowing we’ve got built-in chicken sitters made the decision a whole lot easier. My parents also help out since my Dad’s sawmill is just down the road from us and he’s there pretty much every day. We all share in the eggs, and sell the excess to pay for the feed. Win-win all around. Now if we were talking cows or goats, the story might be different, but I can’t see why it wouldn’t work with the right mix of people and critters.
- Distance from medical facilities – This is something a lot of people don’t think about. Unless you’re a master herbalist, aromatherapist, paramedic, doctor or trained in the military (or maybe even if you are), you’re likely going to need a doctor every once in awhile. And if you’ve got children, elderly parents, or a medical condition that requires regular care, you’ll want to ensure you have access to appropriate medical facilities. Every day I read about people complaining about lack of medical facilities in the communities they’ve recently moved to. This is something you’ll absolutely want to check out ahead of time.
- Much reduced entertainment opportunities – We’re so lucky – we’re close enough to the city to have world-class musicians, theatre and other arts performances make their way across the water to play here. We’ve even got a number of the super famous who actually live in our communities (not that we see them often – they come here to get away from their flocks of admirers… it’s a great place for that, disappearing). We’ve got two movie theatres (in two different communities), a couple of video rental places (because the internet speed can be far too slow – or throttled – to watch streaming video), poetry readings, dances, art shows, galleries, sports teams, studios, top-notch restaurants – there’s no shortage of things to do. I remember when we first arrived, thinking, “What on earth are we going to do here?” But that’s never, ever been a problem. Smaller communities may not have the huge variety of opportunities, but even the tiniest town has dances and social events, touring musicians and farmers’ markets. And if there is nothing – there’s your opportunity to start something!
- Bugs – I lived in the city for 22 years. And in that time, I forgot what mosquitoes were. There just weren’t any buzzing around the townhouse. And then I came back here. Holy moly, those suckers are big! And they’re nothing here compared to some parts of the country. What does this mean? We can’t eat dinner outside in summer without a screen tent – or some sort of bug zapper that we haven’t yet invested in. Great for the chickens and bats, not so great for our social life. Good thing we’ve got our essential oils now to ward of the blood sucking beasts!
- Power outages – It goes without saying that country life means power outages. More trees means more potential for downed or shorted out lines. And less population means fewer available staff, and let’s face it, lower priority, when a big storm blows through the region. You can plan for this with alternate power and/or light and heat sources, emergency food stores, and knowing what parts of the area are less likely to experience power outages. Here, we just happen to be on the trunk that goes out every time the wind blows. And no, I didn’t check that out before we moved. Wish I would have!
- Fending off wildlife – Some areas have more of an issue with this than others, but most rural homesteads will experience run-ins with wildlife. Add livestock, and the ante is upped. Here we have birds of prey (hawks, mostly), black bear, coyotes, weasels, mountain lion and apparently wolves moving back into their historic ranges. Then there are the marauding elk, and the deer (which all of the other predators are feeding on), and the smaller critters like mice and squirrels that can do incredible damage if left unchecked. My own feeling on this is that the wildlife has as much right to be here as we do, and that my plunking ourselves down in amongst them, with yummy-smelling livestock penned and fenced and sitting ‘ducks’, and warm homes for the smaller creatures to nest in, we’re taking on a huge responsibility to keep everyone safe. I know a lot of people will just shoot any predator or pest on their property, rather than work through deterrence programs and securing their livestock properly. I know it won’t make me popular to say this, but when you put your family and livestock on a rural property, it’s your job to keep everyone safe – and that includes the indigenous creatures (unless they are creatures you can add to your food stores, of course – that’s different…). If you keep finding wild snakes in your henhouse, it’s time to secure the henhouse, not keep shooting the snakes. Native snakes have an important place in the ecology of your local area. Just sayin’…
- Lack of rural living skills – I think it’s pretty clear that if you can’t split firewood, have a black thumb, or have trouble dispatching a chicken if it’s mortally injured or on it’s last legs, then homesteading can prove pretty challenging. I say this as someone who still has very few rural living skills, at least compared to someone who has been doing this for years. Sure I can split shakes, pile firewood, wash clothes without electricity, know the habits of our local predators and am taking a Permaculture Design Course – but there’s so, so much to learn! I haven’t yet had to dispatch a chicken (the coyote did that for me, unplanned, of course), and I’ve yet to put away a full winter’s worth of food in a root cellar, but I fully intend to learn how – and soon. But let’s not despair and think it all hopeless – the great news is that there are literally thousands of books, magazines, YouTube videos and websites devoted to exactly this – teaching rural living skills to newbies. I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing many of them, and I know will be connecting with many more. But the best teacher, I have to say, is experience. We just need to get out there and do it, no matter how freaky it is to our urban sensibilities.
- Making a living – When I talk to prospective ‘modern homesteaders’, this is the challenge that comes up most often. How to do it and not starve. Or without having to give up some of our favorite things. Personally, I’ve been able to do this in a way that works for us (though I’m still working out the kinks), putting my corporate experience to work in my own web and design business, run via satellite internet from my little cabin in the woods. Others have one partner commuting to a ‘regular’ job while the other gets the homestead under way. The key here is to be open to new ideas, take an inventory of your skills, and continually invest in your future. If you choose to start your own business, get an experienced mentor, try to do it without too much (or any) debt, but most of all – set the fear aside and go for it!
The Wrap-up
Moving to the country is a huge step on the way to a more self-reliant life. And it’s absolutely not for everyone. But those of us with ‘the bug’, it’s a dream we just can’t shake. With this list, we can make sure we’ve poked and prodded the decision from every angle, so we know in our hearts it’s the right one when we do put that down payment on that dream property.
Next time we’ll get to the good stuff – the benefits of rural living!
Did we miss any challenges? Do you know anyone who moved to the country but just couldn’t take it? We’d love to hear your stories in the comments below – your experiences might just help someone avoid a HUGE mistake! Or better yet, encourage them to finally make the move…
- 11 Lessons Learned from 11 Years of Rural Living - March 23, 2020
- What is ‘Modern Homesteading’, Anyway? - July 17, 2016
- Summer Rural Living Celebration! - July 1, 2014
Victoria…you are a most pragmatic person. Enjoy reading your articles and blogs and hearing your optimism come through almost every sentence. hearing someone else talk about sharing our spot of the earth with snakes, critters and Mosquitos makes it seem a little less daunting! thank you. keep wiring. Are we going to see the “pros” side of things….or are there too many to elaborate on?
Thanks so much, Carol! And yes, Part 2 is coming later this week – the benefits! 🙂
I’m having difficulty finding part 2. Could you help?
Hi there, Tracy I actually haven’t done part 2, but it’s on the way! 🙂 Thanks for stopping by.
Hello Victoria,
I can’t seem to find part 2. Do you have a link?
Thank you!! 🙂
Wise words, indeed – thanks so much for posting this. It really helps others pondering the move that we all go through this – and do it anyway! 😉
I’m currently doing my homework on this
Thanks so much for stopping by, Melissa – I’m a bit behind on my catching up on comments. So much to do, so little time… 😉 Look forward to reading your blog!
I think the one thing I was unprepared for, was some of my city friends acting like I’d moved thousands of miles away – instead of just 72KM – an hours drive… But it taught me who my real friends were, who really cared about me (who really wants to go out partying every weekend, seriously?). Some negative things we’ve had happen in our 2 years since living rural could have happened anywhere, but they are: 1) getting flooded in, in a very wet rainy season (not our house, but the roads), 2) my husband slicing open his foot while a mate who was an ex-army paramedic was there, the mate bandaged him up enough so we could drive to hospital ourselves, 3) breaking my leg when my dog ran into me – could have happened anywhere. 4) by far the worst – my dog who was my ‘other baby’ being mauled to death by ‘wild’ dogs/dingoes. Excluding no 4, they are all part of the life of living in the bush and we love it so much, for those 4 bad days there are over 700 great days to look at! I know its not for everyone, but I can really understand what you mean when you say you could never permanently live back in the city – yes I can sometimes hear my neighbours because their house is 200m away – but at least I cant hear their normal conversations! 🙂 Ah, the serenity! From Darwin, Australia
Thanks so much for your sharing your thoughts, Wendy. SO sorry to hear about your dog. We’ve got coyotes around here that are getting awfully brazen – they’re not a native species to our area and my feeling is they’ve really reduced the population of small prey for some of the other predators. Then again, I guess they become prey for the big wild cats we have here. Great to hear from someone else who loves the serenity… 🙂
This is great a piece on country living. We liveD in a beautiful suburb, 10 minutes from the city and it was time for us to move further out, the city was getting heavily populated and it was noisy and polluted with massive homelessness. I knew 90% of friends and family will not make the drive out to see us if we move . We grew up in the country on the beach, and we wanted to feel better and sleep better . We both loved,the clean, cool air and wind blowing on our faces, and it is peaceful and quiet existence. Once we moved I stopped seeing massive landscaping trucks with leaf blowers and the endless parade of UPS FedEx, pizza delivery trucks all stopped and those late night barking dogs were all left behind in that beautiful, nice suburb that really had a vibe of it’s own
We were ready to move on We moved into a stunning gated country neighborhood where everyone owns a couple acres or more and I love it . Of course we are 37 minutes from the big city. Life is better it is peaceful and quiet. For medical we are 20 minutes from a big hospital, 25 minutes for restaurants, and shopping is a early morning big city thing we do once every two weeks and we plan to go to church on Sundays and get involved in community here. . All just left the big city life we just don’t go to all the big social events nor do we go to galleries, concerts and all that stuff anymore, we do make it out for the Christmas concerts but that is it. Just a peaceful existence.
Sounds lovely!
I’m a young woman currently in the process of deciding to go back to the homestead life. Though I don’t have the money right now to buy a place (boo!), rural living is how I grew up in the middle-of-nowhere Maine on a farm and I want to go back to that style of life. I’m so glad to have found this site to be able to list to my fiance all the good reasons that we should make the big decision. He’s behind it, just wary about moving away from the big city and back to our people’s roots.
Probably the ideal spot for making a transition from the city to the country would be to move just outside a rural town that is large enough to have a hospital, schools, police department, etc. The roads will most likely be paved and also if it is like the county seat you shouldn’t have power issues. A lot of country people don’t have livestock or keep chickens, they get their food mostly from a supermarket just like their big-city counterparts. You really don’t have to know how to sew your own clothes, grow your own food, hunt, fish, etc if you want to live in the country. It can be just as hard or as easy as you want to make it for the most part.
Excellent advice – that’s essentially what we did and are learning as we go (with lots of help). Thanks for stopping by to comment! 🙂
Ahhh, the dream of country life! We made our exodus to a little 10-acre Texas woodlot, jumping into livestock, gardening and “the good life” head first. Long story, full of setbacks and victories, hard winters and glorious growing seasons. I agree with your observation about skills and experience – we had none when we began, so life was hard…joy can be lost in the learning sometimes. I would say count the cost, be realistic about what “fits” you and your family; don’t be afraid to try new things, but take advantage of many counselors to avoid doing everything the hard way. By God’s grace, we were able to take a run-down, overgrown little patch of land and a beat up doublewide repo and turn it into a productive, even more beautiful property – which we sold for a handy profit. We moved to another rural community, live in town now, but still garden and keep a few chickens. A little less to manage, but doing well and using the skills and experience we gained from our adventure in the country!
Good advice – thanks so much for sharing your experience… 🙂
We did little research before moving to the country ,except we want as a few neighbors as possible. We both we’re going to work .I drove two hours each way. We had property paid off quicker that to start our next project . Barns ,gardens and a.greenhouse business.
Many things did not work out but my parter’s business did great so that left todo the farm and my construction jobs
The hardest thing is find someone to watch the farm
That seems to be a common challenge, for sure. Hopefully the benefits are worth it… 🙂
I loved reading your article it’s nice to know how it is before you move into it. We have been thinking about being more self-sustaining and more country living. Now we are looking at it in a more sophisticated way and thanks for your experience helps a lot.
Glad it was helpful. Thank you!
I’m delighted to have found your site as we’re considering moving to the country. I was hoping I’d find a resource like this, Victoria!
I’ve searched the web for part 2 (because I’m desperate need of benefits right now! ha!) Can you post the link to part 2?
Thanks so much!
I am in the UK and moved from London to Devon 16 years ago (as a single mum with a 6 year old). These last 16 years have been a terrible struggle for me. The public transport is poor and I do not drive (can’t afford to take lessons or buy a car). People are different here too…they are not cultural or intellectual – nothing like my old friends. Many are nice enough, but there is no real connection…and I often feel terribly lonely/isolated. My son is now grown up and away at university, but now I am forced to remain here (in this tiny town with 6000 inhabitants) due to my mother’s condition after an accident (and head injury)…when I am not at work, I am helping take care of her.
Being without transport (no buses in or out of the town after 7pm), being a carer, having very little funds….all these things are made worse by the fact that I rarely get invited to social events (even those within walking distance). Country living is NOT good when these are the circumstances. I am naturally a very gregarious person (as all my real – but sadly, long-distance – friends will tell you). My son tells me that it’s because I am more unusual than people round here…..he says that they don’t know how to bond with me (despite the fact that I am always friendly and sociable when I actually do spend any time with them). I do have unconventional outlooks about many topics/life in general, and although I tone these down, they must sense that we are different. Plus they are all in couples and do ‘couple stuff’ together. I don’t actually want to be in a relationship (find them stifling and claustrophobic), but I would really love to have some kind of regular social life…rather than just waiting until I can travel to see my long-distance friends.
I think of my 16 years here in this tiny Devon ‘town’ as ‘The Wilderness Years’. I hate it – but am trapped here for the foreseeable future.
Thanks so much for sharing your experiences. I think it’s REALLY important that folks take these things into account. To be truthful, I don’t connect with a lot of folks here either – haven’t met my kindred spirits yet… but I love the town and the lifestyle. But without a vehicle, I’m sure I’d feel much the same as you do – I didn’t have a car for years before moving here, but had to purchase a pre-owned one when we moved here. I can’t imagine being without one – at least not the way we’ve got our lives currently set up. Again, thank you so much for sharing your experience – I’m sure it will be extremely helpful for more than a few folks.
Love your honesty. It is important to know the challenges for sure. We are hoping to move an a property just outside a medium sized city. Was wondering how you deal with snow removal ?
Glad it was helpful! As for snow removal, thankfully we don’t get much snow around here. We’re fortunate that there’s a business down the road that owns graders and they plough the road if the regional district can’t get out our way for awhile. As for the driveway, I don’t even try… 😉 We just park at the bottom or use the 4-wheel drive.
This is great but where is part 2 about the benefits???
So sorry about that! I’ll go back and get it updated ASAP.
During the COVID pandemic many people fled the cities for rural areas. These people drove rural prices up to crazy heights in their rush to get away from the restrictions COVID placed on city dwellers. In addition to driving up property prices (and you know the rates won’t go down again once they go up), these people also overload already overloaded small town facilities and are often demanding and rude to country people whom they think are stupid or hicks. I wish they had all just thought it through a bit, because even if you can work from home there are so many other things that people just did not consider. The lack of medical services, as you mentioned, but also the lack of secondary schools, of tertiary opportunities and of jobs for their children. I am looking out to see those people all move back in a few years when they realise they should’ve thought things through better before they just rushed out there. They woukd have done well to read your blog.
Thanks so much for your comment. Yes, the same things happened here the last two years. Property prices are insane. People losing their rental homes as landlords sell or turn them into short term rentals. It’s a mess…